Note: this post was written two years ago for another blog of mine. I feel like, now that I work full-time outside the home, the feelings that inspired me to write this are more present and relevant than ever.
I’m fairly new to my role as a stay-at-home mom; I’ve only been doing this since the beginning of the year.
To be brutally honest, I haven’t quite figured out if I’m cut out for this. I firmly believe that not everyone is, and that’s okay. Right now, I’m just thankful that I have the opportunity to find out if being a SAHM is for me.
One evening earlier this week, as I was standing at the stove stirring scrambled eggs, something occurred to me: how often have I used the phrase “just a minute” in the last few weeks?
A lot, I would guess. With a clingy toddler, it’s bound to happen. There are times, like tonight, when I can’t step away from what I’m doing. Whether it’s bathing his sister or rolling out bread dough, there are simply going to be times when I can’t drop what I’m doing for his non-emergent requests.
But there are also times, much more frequently, that I can. I can stop halfway through unloading the dishwasher to crawl around on the kitchen floor playing puppies; I can pause in chopping veggies to refill his cup of water; I can leave that text message or blog post half-composed while I help him search for his missing “elly-coptee”.
I didn’t become a stay-at-home mom to miss the little moments with my kids; I became a stay-at-home because those are the moments that are most important to me. I want to soak up this time when my children are little; I’ve already learned that babyhood is fleeting.
I’m now making an effort to be intentional about my responses to G. Every time he makes a request and I begin to respond with “just a minute,” I evaluate whether or not whatever I’m doing really can’t wait. If it can’t, I reassure him that I’ll be with him quickly, and I use that opportunity to encourage patience. If it can, I stop what I’m doing and see to his needs.
My goal isn’t to raise spoiled children who are impatient and entitled. Rather, I want to raise kids who know they are loved, they are valued, and they are worth more to me than anything else I might be doing.
While this will certainly take practice to learn, I’ve found that just thinking consciously about it is already making a difference. And I’m much more relaxed when my day is constantly filled with sweet reminders of why I do what I do.
This was just what I needed to read! Baby girl has been very clingy lately and I find myself annoyed by it. But soon the day will come when she won’t want me to hold her and tickle her. Or hold her up to the window just so she can see outside. Thanks for the reminder!
I think we’re all guilty of wishing away those difficult phases and stages. It takes a conscious effort every.single.day to be present in that moment. You’re welcome and thanks for the sweet words!